Some Facebook Status Updates are Worth a Mention - 80

• There is an annoying fly in my house. Where is Mr. Miyagi and his chopsticks when you need him? It is quite challenging to practice walking on 6" heels while simultaneously trying to kill a fly.
• choppin wood.
• is off to see the wizard.
• Will Ferrell did "wanted, dead or alive" karaoke at the black pussycat. Really Will? You want to go?
• is pregaming in a cab with Woodchuck and a noncompliant driver whilst in traffic on the Turnpike awaiting U2
• just spotted woman in her PJs pushing her stroller (kid in tow) into the liquor store parking lot. That's what I call bottle service.
• Hanging with some hot Swedes for Happy Hour this evening at PS450. Swedes and Swedish vodka. We need the Swedish chef from The Muppets and it will be a trifecta
• Sometimes, I feel like my life is one, long conference call.
• still looking for a ride to Montreal on Friday (or Saturday)... Jets are fine, too.
• 11 years after graduating from high school, I still second guess myself every time I wear a red shirt with grey pants (Fair Lawn graduate - who actually was voted most school spirit!)
• i see that my tuition goes to valet at monmouth university... yuppie pricks
• officially brain dead. Just got ready, and walked out door for event that is...next week.
• when will my blackberry understand that I want to type the word "porn" and not the word "open".... damn predictive text
• Just got a paper cut and I swear I heard the sheet of paper laugh and whisper "biiiiiiiiiitch"
• got realy high last night...rock climbing! ha! gotchya hopefuls ;-)
• i HATE drama. shut up and deal with life you whiney bitches.
• Where was I when U2 tickets went on sale? Seems like I'm the only one in town not going. "I still haven't found what I'm lookin' for ...."
• me: you think Luigi was the younger of the two brothers? I would assume so... and do you think he resented Mario for getting most of the fame, the princess and being able to run faster? Saul: i think he liked being #2 some people are more comf...ortable in that role, and I think Luigi was one of those people
• is sometimes amazed with the unplanned poetry that comes out of his mouth..
• lips on fire.. holy (general) tso!
• The map included with my globe seems unecessary
• Text messaging: When you want to take twice the amount of time to deliver half the information.
• I'm honestly 4 seconds away from stapling my eye lids to my forehead.
• awesome. 2 mosquito bites on my face. good thing i'm allergic. this week keeps getting better and better...
• is wondering if the Mackenzie Phillips tell-all book will be titled "One Dad at a Time"