January 12, 2010

American Idol Season 9 | Auditions Day 1 and 2

Here we are - American Idol. Season 9. 2010. Minus Paula. Plus Ellen.Two hour season premiere.

Last season, Kris Allen won American Idol, beating out Adam Lambert. Funny how I haven't heard about anything Kris Allen is working on. He joins in the other Idol winners who have succussfully amounted to nothing: Fantasia, Taylor Hicks and Rubben Studdard.

Boston, MA - Day 1
Trying to rake in even more viewers, American brings in Victoria Beckham as the first celebrity judge.

"I go to the bathroom. I jump up and down and I tell myself I'm awesome," says the first girl up. Funnily enough, my old roommate BBMed me and said this girl reminds her of me. After watching, I realized why. I AM this girl! I play American Idol on PlayStation and think I can be the next American Idol because Simon thinks I'm good! Did I say "play?" I meant "played." I digress. This girl is really jacking herself up in the bathroom. It's amazing. I mean, is this real? She is horrific.

Pat Ford:



Amadeo Derocco from Rhode Island is the Vinny of Jersey Shore. But is he good? I have my doubts. Sure, he can sing this song - but I feel like I need to hear him sing something else. I don't think he was THAT good. I don't know why Kara thinks she's like some big Italiano, throwing in a "fellow paizon" out there.

Derek from Bellingham, MA - the spiritual one. The Enigma music is key here. Before taking a moment to stop and smell the flowers, Derek takes the audition stage. Victoria asks him if he's a fan of Chris Brown, to which he answers, "Yea, I like how he touches young kids all around the world." Whoops! Yea, he sucks. It's "utter rubbish" according to Simon.

Luke Shaffer from New York. Damn homie. My friend and I paused the TV to look him up on Facebook. Turns out there's ALREADY a group with 24 people as fans of Luke Shaffer. Like 24 people paused the TV to look him up and created a group. I mean, 25. wink! Want to be a fan of Luke? Click HERE

This next guy is not real. Andrew Finley He's hot. And he is acting like a total tool. I WILL NOT believe there is someone so weird out there. I think this is all a ruse for ratings.

Ashley Rodriguez. Gorgeous. Top 24. You heard it here first.

Tyler Grady with the broken wrists is pretty good! He needs a makeover, but then all should be well.

Boston, MA - Day 2
Is this history lesson necessary in American Idol?

Mike Davis sings Yesterday by The Beatles. He's pretty good! Victoria Beckham needs to eat a cheeseburger. Or drink a five hour energy. I think it's stupid and rude that Simon and Randy just got off the set after putting in their answers. Douches. I like Mike Davis!!! He's totally my type of dude!

Katie Stevens is just ADORBnation about her grandmother. This 16-year-old is THE BEST audition I have seen today. Top 24.

Justin Williams, 27, Sandy, UT. He is THE ABSOLUTE HOTTEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN. He should be on American's Next Top Model Idol. In fact, that should be a show. This cancer survivor is quickly going to climb the ranks. LOTS of good looking people in the competition! Holler. [see clip above] Like, Victoria Beckham just told him he was hot.

"You sing like a three-year-old girl. You dress like LaToya Jackson. You have a beard." - Simon re: Norberto. Hahaha, oh man.

Leah Laurenti skings Blue Skies. I'm mixed on her. There is really something about her I don't like. I can't figure out if she knows who she is yet. She runs into the arms of her husky man with the great news that she's going to Hollywood.

AIGHT YO. SEE YOU TOMORROW.