Some Facebook Status Updates Are Worth a Mention

I judge your Facebook Status Updates.

• Gladys Malungcot Just called-out sick by email, and the reply was, "ok, feel better!". So nice! I was so used to the "just take xyz and you'll be fine" or "staffing is really low, you have to come in" from my other job. I'm really fortunate to be working where I am right now. Alright, I'm going back to my Percocet-induced sleep now, g'night!
• Revi Hay Tonight we celebrate Shavuot- the receiving of the 10 Commandments :) We could all use a little "Thou shall not covet..." these days, right? So often are we concerned with what others have, what we don't have, and what we wish we had- that we lose sight of our true riches. If we recognize all that's ours and not worry about what he/she has or why don't I have what he/she has- we'd all be much happier. Chag sameach
• Viktoriya Zilberman can we please focus on something else besides politicians' sex lives
• Traci Coulter sitting next to sheri o'teri and I really want to ask her to bust out some SNL skits
• Andrew Goldstein Bentley. Emmy. Best Actor. No question. #Bachelorette
• Brianne Bartlett DeLucca kathy's husband on rhonj cracks me UP "I just hope there's no braawhls...everytime we get togetha wit these people its a friggin' nightmahe"
• Jim Shi LMAO: DVF closes CFDA Awards show b/c Anderson Cooper left! "He had to go deal with this Weiner situation," she says.
• Adrianna Giuliani A Bentley is even a douchie car
• Jen Khoury Someone signed me up for us weekly magazine. The front cover says "hot bodies 2011." whoever you are, I hate you.
• Laura Levins Bonham Seriously, how can I become part of a flash mob dance crew?!?
• Anthony Crupi Don't forget: ALL jeans are pajama jeans if you drink a lot.
• Meg Hemphill flight attendant asks what I want. I say champagne, she says they don't have any--I respond with a look of horror. "we have white wine," she says. I can't drink white wine at 7 am ma'am--that's what alcoholics do. (so I guess the only thing between alcoholism and myself are some bubbles, sugar and fermentation. hm)
• Andrew Goldstein Nintento's new system is called the Wii U... tho they prob could've gotten more publicity if they named it the Wii NER.
• Maggie Di Vita Dear Katy Perry, Please stop making music. Please. Thanks so much, Maggie D
• JohnBart Skelton I want to be reincarnated as Gentleman Gaga.
• Jennifer Caluri less than three months to first day of school. if that isn't positive thinking I don't know what is
• Ben Schwartz It would be really ironic if jelly had a peanut allergy.
• Rachel Wallins For someone who is as interested in other people as I am, jury duty is just AWESOME.