November 30, 2011

Some Facebook Status Updates Are Worth a Mention

Dear Diary, why do you never write me back?
awkward moment...Vanessa Carlton song starts playing on my pandora and there's Vanessa Carlton standing at my office doorway lol

How many Christmas songs is the jewish Elvis going to sing at the tree?
Wondering who is more upset about Perry Lazarus's flight being delayed from Houston - me or ZZ Top who is sitting in first class
The early bird doesn't get the hangover!!!!
Catch me solving mysteries like Wikipedia Brown.
It's definitely time to go to sleep when all the European people I follow on Twitter start saying good morning.
America's Supernanny series - makes my son look like a very well-behaved child, makes my husband look like a model spouse, and makes me look like I actually know what I'm doing around here... Who knew that this show would be so good for my self esteem?! :)
I don't get it. WHY are roaches SO BIG in the city, and the city only?!? Do they have a New York state of mine or something? I just saw one by our bathroom that was literally 2.5 inches long. I had a real boy (not made for tv like me) go kill it.

I honestly don't see the difference between slaughtering a cow and slaughtering a horse. It's all slaughter to me. My main question is (and here's where I lose the animal rights people): does horse even taste good?
Horses could soon be butchered in the U.S. for human consumption after Congress quietly lifted a 5-year-old ban on funding horse meat inspections, and activists say slaughterhouses could be up and running in as little as a month.