May 21, 2012

Some Facebook Status Updates Are Worth a Mention

You people made me laugh today:


Facebook is not the phone people.

Toms aren't waterproof, guys. In case, you too, were thinking about making the brilliant decision to wear them in a thunderstorm.

Guess who forgot her umbrella this morning...the soaked person typing this message.

My favorite kind of morning is when I think I see my keys in my purse before I shut my front door, only to discover it is just my key ring that has fallen off, leading to the realization that I am now locked out of both my house and my car, thus necessitating I call a cab to get me to work. Yup. Favorite. Flipping. Kind.

most of the men I have dated, giving myself a pretend facelift in the mirror and the fact I played Farmville. #thingsIamembarrassedtoadmit

‎"He says maybe we should go to physical therapy together"- Teresa Giudice- the newest member of Mensa

Anyone else noticed that the wedding photos of Priscilla Chan have become increasingly airbrushed since Saturday to make her appear thinner/more angelic and porcelain? Seriously, people have too much time on their hands and need to go help kids in Haiti or do their laundry. #annoyingmedia