February 15, 2013

Some Facebook Status Updates Are Worth a Mention


I gave up nothing for Lent, because I am JEWISH!!!

Eating while pooping. #YOLO

‎"I like this holiday better than Halloween because there are no spiders but still lots of chocolate." -perfect 4 year old logic

Happy Valentine’s Day to all you couples. Sucks that one of you is going to die first, but try not to let that ruin your stupid fucking day.

Worst Valentine’s Day card: “Roses are red / Violets are blue / Ghosts watch you poop / And this guy does, too.” * points thumb to self *

my grandma's last name is valentine. to celebrate this day she goes to publix and demands free cookies. they usually appease her.

You know you've lived in NYC too long when you are quickly filling out an online drop-down box for "Country" and when you scroll down to New Zealand you pause and wonder, "Where is New York?"