June 10, 2013

Some Facebook Status Updates Are Worth a Status Update: June 10

You people made me laugh today:

Lindsay Erin — at Governors Ball Music Festival.
My husband Jason Stackhouse #trueblood #ryankwanten - his eyes are closed because he was savoring our moment

There is someone in South Philly named Phat Ho. #that'sgottasuck

I was emailed by a saudi prince asking me for money. That's just silly. So i sent him my bank account number and social security number so he can just take care of it himself. I dont have the time to handle his issues.

My phone keeps trying to Americanize me by autocorrecting "yalla" to "y'all."

If the president listens to my voice mails or reads my inbox, he's probably just going to need a stiff drink and a cold shower.

I don't know what it is, but recently I find myself starting off sentences with, "1." and then realizing that I don't have a "2." or "3."

"My iPod was stolen at the gym today. I acted like Kirstie Alley at a cake sale. It wasn't cute."~John Michael Di Spirito

High school kids across the street are being loud and laughing on a nice summers night. I remember those. However its annoying me and they need to shut up. Why am i 90 years old and cranky?

best way to save face is to keep the lower half of it shut

trying to decide whether or not she likes fresh mozz and tomatoes #italiangirlproblem