June 12, 2013

Some Facebook Status Updates Are Worth a Mention

You people made me laugh today:

If it's true that Kate Middleton and Kim Kardashian are due on the same day, I'm pretty sure the internet will break. (And I will jump out of a window.)

I just got invited to a nudist colony in Mexico on a press trip. Best. Email. Ever. (and no I'm not going)

It's really cute when people think that blocking your e-mail will somehow discourage you from reaching out on other platforms. Stalker? I prefer "enthusiastic communicator."

Ever own a dress you THOUGHT was fabulous and you then saw one photo of yourself in it and you have no choice but to burn the dress, and in hope, its memory, forever? Yeah, me either.

In 2002, I thought to myself, "I really should just have one username and one password for any website so I don't forget it." REALLY wish I stuck to that strategy. Because right now it's a total clusterF.

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago, the second best? Today!

It's official. I love bald men.

Kim Kardashian looks like she swallowed Kanye West whole

Dear cabbies: on duty is supposed to mean on duty, not "where are you going?" through the window.

Working on a power point except I have no power and really no point

basically just waiting until its dark out so I can justify going to sleep

I find it very hard to believe the pig on the Geico commercial is using the app to do things using his hooves. I can't even type "love" without it coming up "live" thanks to my fat finger.

Is it Friday yet? I need to sleep for at least two days straight

If Kanye is "Yeezus", does that mean his unborn child is a Yetus?

Klaudia attended her first opera concert this evening. She "sang" along at a very high pitch. The crowd loved her, I'm sure of it.