Some Status Updates Are Worth A Mention - 50

• NOTE TO SELF: next time you fly to Orlando,FL please remember the hundreds of kids in coach excited for Disney and suck it up with an upgrade to first class.
• just passed the neighborhood homeless man who was complaining to the wind about not getting his tax documents.
• got to the airport, laptop dead, ipod dead, long island college meatheads everywhere headed to spring break. terrific.
• is going from Dayton,NJ to Dayton,oh. life is trippy like that sometimes.
• just witnessed a man pull over on the parkway and start peeing!
• Has never watched a single episode of ER and won't start tonight.
• If you dont stand behind our troops,feel free, to stand in front of them!
• "your apartment is your bedroom, new york is your livng room"- some dude.
• is happy america voted to boot the blonde... she's cute but i'd rather hear my dishwasher run than her sing.
• unfortunately i had an accident at the vet today and peed on the table........... twice.(Doggie's profile -- LOVE IT!)
• complete and total breakdown at the NYPD tow place. They are super charming there. Super.
• is pregnant, engaged, getting an abortion, dying of cancer, curing cancer, winning the lottery, moving back to Wisconsin, getting fired, buying a pony, and making cliche April Fool's jokes
• thinks its funny that some people he went to HS with think I am gay. So funny. At least I know people are looking at my Facebook page.
• Almost done with week #1 of the J'bart ReInvention Diet. Loving that my pants no longer feel like a corset. I had better see my ribs my May!
• Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.
• wishes she could do time outs a la zack morris style
• accepted her mom's friend-request but blocked her from seeing status updates or wall posts. So carry on with "your mom" jokes.