August 13, 2009

Today's TFLN Features

(937): Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
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(248): it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
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(732): My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
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(562): omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
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(405): Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
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(330): and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
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(469): i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
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(757): I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"