April 16, 2013

Some Facebook Status Updates Are Worth a Mention

You people made me laugh today:


It's cute that this Macklemore guy thinks a Gucci tee costs $50.


If you have not already completed your taxes, taxation is not your biggest problem.


Tax Season is almost in the books....I can't wait until this day is Over... Only numbers I am worrying about for the rest of this week are yardage numbers on Par 5's and 4's, and what number cocktail I am on after golf is done....


When the Pulitzers are announced, don't bother congratulating me. I don't do it for the fame. Or the money. Or the satisfaction. Or at all.


I work with more dicks on a daily basis than a 99 cent hooker.


Stupid 'find my iPhone' feature only tells you the address it is located. Duh. I know it's in my house, just don't know WHERE! And where are my sunglasses?


Random Moments at Reception:
ME: CORE Media Group...may I help you?
CALLER: Is this Teexie Medical Group?
ME: Well, considering I just answered the phone and politely greeted you with "CORE Media Group".....I'd have to go with no, but I'm more than happy to pretend you're NOT an asshole and pretend this IS Teexie Medical Group."
CALLER: ***CLICK***DIALTONE******************************


Scott Baio was surprised to learn that what he thought was "hitting on underage girls" was actually "filming his new Nickelodeon show"


Lauryn Kahn — at (The Grand Palace).
This family is doin everything right.