November 26, 2013

Some Facebook Status Updates Are Worth a Mention

You people made me laugh today:

Woke up this morning convinced my water broke. Then I realized Ben left an open water bottle in my bed at 6am. Boo.

Caffeine is bad for you, fat is bad you, sugar is bad for you. But don't worry, because that's bad for you too.
Whenever I go to the gym, I yell, "BEAST MODE!" Then eat 5 donuts.

The consistences with Claire Danes roots episode over episode are beyond annoying.

Every winter season, I lose a right handed glove...I lost it already this morning; Life - 24,652 vs Kenny - 22.8 ‪#‎fml‬ ‪#‎ojsimpson‬

It's freezing at home. It's freezing in my office. I'm freezing all day. This is not a haiku.

If you want to ride a train in Germany, first you must solve a puzzle. ‪#‎ketchumscholar‬