September 3, 2013

Some Facebook Status Updates Are Worth a Mention: Sept. 3

You people made me laugh:

It appears my wife has been single-handedly saving the economy again while using my computer. How else do you explain every sponsored ad on FB recommending size 6 sandals at Nordstrom? Coincidence? I think not. Their stock price was up .50% at one point earlier today.

My understanding is if of you learn to play the banjo, you are instantly one of the 10 best banjo players in the world.

If it goes without saying then shut the fuck up

OK Facebook, let's keep these ridiculous lists to 10 or less. No one needs to see a list of the "Top 67 Autocorrects."

F this. I'm still going to dress and act like it's summer.

When I get a single "K" text in place of "OK" I can never tell if it's because the person is too busy to type out the "O," too lazy, or so pissed at me they feel I don't deserve a whole "OK."

My eye doctor told me in the most concerned manner that my prescription was WAY off so I ordered a new pair of glasses. I am super pumped, but also very terrified about seeing what the world is supposed to look like.

I love how Facebook thinks that I should know Jessica Simpson and friend request her. Think she might know who I am?

Gennady Borukhovich — at Will Rogers State Beach.
Hotdogs or legs. Bet ya can't guess!

I love that this was in my newsfeed... #irony

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