Some Facebook Status Updates Are Worth A Mention

You people made me laugh:

Anna Battiloro

Dear Snow,
Have it your way. I'm hanging up my shovel till the sun wakes his ass up and melts you away.
Love, Anna

Jennifer Caluri

ISO sugar daddy

Vera Sweeney

Go to BJs to buy napkins because we are all out. Spend an hour in the store. Get home having spent $200 and realize I never bought the napkins. ‪#‎awesome‬

Robin Cannito Gold

good old facebook just suggested I friend someone who I've had blocked for years. glad to see these privacy settings are working out.

Jen Khoury

I really wish recruiters would stop calling me about "great opportunities" to sell life insurance.

Jared Kahn

Anyone else find it appalling that the lottery jackpot is half a billion dollars when so many people are hungry and out of work in this country?

Karina Al at Hackensack Gastroenterology

Weird place to have Food Network playing in the waiting room

Alina Lipkin

Tomorrow: I return my car to the dealership bc my lease is up.

Today: I get a massive nose bleed on my drive home.

Mercedes is gonna think I'm Dexter.

Nick McGlynn at Ybor City

I've waited my whole life for this moment...

Ben Mehl

It's raining hard in Los Angeles, so everything is cancelled until 2014, sorry guys.

Bryce Gruber

The nice thing about adulthood is when you run away from home it can be to a spa instead of your neighbor's treehouse. In search of a treehouse with aromatherapy now.